I'm rarely a pessimist, sometimes an optimist, but most of the time I'm just a realist and the reality of everything is that this pregnancy has not been the easiest thing I've ever done! I have always actually been a real optimist about all this stuff saying: "just keep positive, happy thoughts and your endorphines will help your body feel better when your sick"....etc. Well I wish that was the case but I am to the point now (21 weeks along) where I think I just have to live with feeling sick and I just have to shove food down my throat even though I want to regurgitate it that second! (I'm feeling much better than I used to, but still not good!) I know it's a bit more difficult now cause I don't have the cute one in my arms, but once I do I'm sure it will be so wonderful....and so worth it.... but everyone seems to be so pessimistic!
"Just wait" seems to be the famous phrase to tell people when they want you to know that you have something bad, or not fun coming up.
It's like people just always want to tell me "just wait" to make me feel bad! Who want's anyone to feel BAD??? But they do!
It's like I say.... "I'm actually feeling pretty good right now".... "Oh you just wait...you'll feel sick eventually, most people do! And some people stay sick their whole pregnancy!" (yes, actually said to me!)
People will say, oh my you are so small and thin still.... "Oh just wait... you'll get big soon enough! I knew someone just as small as you and she gained over 50 pounds. She was miserable!" (Actually I've heard this one, and worse, about 15 times!) Why can't they just say "Oh I can't wait til you start showing, you are going to look so cute with a belly!" From what I hear from people who have been pregnant, that's exactly what they need to hear to boost their self esteem in a time when they don't feel cute, or have to adjust to a body which they never really thought through the reality of!
Or when people ask if I'm sleeping okay and I say yes they'll say "Oh just wait, later in your pregnancy you won't.... and then especially when the baby gets here, just plan on no sleep for the rest of your life!" Matt and I stay up late and then I sleep in, which I know will change with a baby and I'm fine with that! But people are so quick to be like... "you just wait, you'll be in hell with all of us soon." (Of course I'm paraphrasing, and
possibly exaggerating but it's what I feel like)
It's not like we didn't know these things people! We knew what we were getting ourselves into.... we got off all birth control for heavens sakes! These things are not surprises. Gaining weight is a given, getting sick is something that I knew was likely, no sleep...duh (I've never actually been a fan of sleep anyways). People are just so negative sometimes and I'm sick of it.
Other people knew what they were getting theirselves into as well so STOP COMPLAINING! It's fine to say... "I'm really tired lately, I've had no sleep cause of my baby"; or "my kid has been a real rascal lately and sometimes I just want to scream", these are realities and I'm sure every parent has felt and said these things, but don't hope and anticipate and claim to every pregnant woman that she'll hate being a mom because of these things.... and ultimately saying (at least what it seems to me) "You made the wrong decision! You should have never had kids! There is nothing good about it!" I've heard people say... the ONLY good thing about having children is that eventually you get to be a grandparent! Well you know what, tell me that about 25 years from now.... but right now I want to be excited about becoming a parent!!! And who knows, I might actually like it better than being a grandparent (my mom says she does)!
Here's the point! There are definitely hard things about everything...work, family, health, money...etc. Life is not ALL fun and pure bliss, but it should still be mostly fun and still mostly blissful, amidst all the crazy stuff!
I just want to hear about people that actually love being a parent and actually love their kids. It seems like nobody does anymore.
Why do you think I said when I got married "Give me a year and we'll have kids." and now 4 years later we're just starting a family! It's cause it never sounded fun! People don't make it sound like something that's wonderful and rewarding. Motherhood, parenthood in general, doesn't seem as cherished as it once was, and as it should!
I love my mom, and I hope she feels like she got all that she wanted out of being a parent and I hope she feels that she accomplished her goals of being the best mother she could. She has 8 kids that love her and can and DO go to her with ANYTHING! Now I'd say that's success! And not only that but I'd say we had a heck of a lot of fun a long the way! I can't picture a happier family or fun-loving family! That doesn't mean my mom got lots of sleep or didn't want to scream cause we made her crazy! It means that amidst everything, we had a BLAST!
So I'm not gonna "just wait." I'm going to live in the moment and enjoy it with any hardship that comes along in that moment.
I hope I never have such negative things to say about my kids... so much to the point that people think I hate being a mother! I love life, even though I do actually think I hate food :). I still have a good time every day! I laugh just as much as I did when I wasn't sick, and I share such good company, especially my husband, and I have a little growing one in my belly that makes me so happy!
All in all, I think I'm pretty darn blessed! And I am so excited to have something so wonderful to wake up to in the middle of the night! I can't wait, but until then I'm gonna enjoy the little kicks, hits, and turns that reminds me that our little girl is getting ready to come into this world! Yay for children, for motherhood/parenthood, and yay for the miracle and blessing of life!!!
